When I was in my mother's womb, her doctor declared that I would be born in April, But I was operated out in February. I was born premature, as if God was in a hurry to bring me out to the world. That was the last time I was early. Since then I have gained fame for being late for everything, maybe it is my subconscious form of rebellion for not being given a month and a half in my mother's cozy womb. No, that is actually just bullshit. I am just simply LAZY.
Whenever I have something to do or somewhere to go (on time), I start doing(how should I put it?), nothing. Yes, nothing. I'll illustrate this with a simple example. My classes begin at 9 in the morning. I am fully awake by 7:15. Then I start my daily routine of passing time doing nothing, against my own wish and inevitably, reach college 15 minutes after 9.
In sophisticated terms, this act is called procrastination. I know that I have to do something but I postpone it, till I can hardly breathe due the stress I am inducing on myself. I don't know why I do this but I positively HATE IT!
The first time I noticed that I procrastinate was probably when I was 11. I was unprepared for a test that happened to be the next day. I decided to study for it and immediately decided against it, thinking that I could do it an hour later. Time flew by till it was near midnight and I was still unprepared. I spent all night studying and hating myself. I vowed to never do it again. But I did it. Again. And again. Now I can't stop.
In Psychology, we did a chapter on Freud's theory of motivation. For those who don't know who Sigmund Freud is, he was a neurologist was came to be known as "The Father of Psychoanalysis". Anyway, so according to Freud, humans have two kinds of motivation, "Eros" or the life motivation and "Thanatos" or the death motivation. Positive acts like taking care of oneself, eating, drinking, reproducing, etc fall under the first type of motivation and Acts like addiction, self-harm, fall under the second category.
I panicked! What I do is like a death wish! No no no! Have to find a solution, now!
First thing I decided to is stop calling myself a procrastinator. The word has too much of a know-it-all ring to it and makes me only want to find the "scientific" reason behind my stupidity instead of actually doing the work.. By the time I complete saying the word, I have already lost half of my motivation. And honestly, it is just the euphemistic version of lazy. So, I have decided to call myself LAZY, every time I get the urge to postpone my work.
I start with it TODAY. Right NOW.
Whenever I have something to do or somewhere to go (on time), I start doing(how should I put it?), nothing. Yes, nothing. I'll illustrate this with a simple example. My classes begin at 9 in the morning. I am fully awake by 7:15. Then I start my daily routine of passing time doing nothing, against my own wish and inevitably, reach college 15 minutes after 9.
In sophisticated terms, this act is called procrastination. I know that I have to do something but I postpone it, till I can hardly breathe due the stress I am inducing on myself. I don't know why I do this but I positively HATE IT!
The first time I noticed that I procrastinate was probably when I was 11. I was unprepared for a test that happened to be the next day. I decided to study for it and immediately decided against it, thinking that I could do it an hour later. Time flew by till it was near midnight and I was still unprepared. I spent all night studying and hating myself. I vowed to never do it again. But I did it. Again. And again. Now I can't stop.
In Psychology, we did a chapter on Freud's theory of motivation. For those who don't know who Sigmund Freud is, he was a neurologist was came to be known as "The Father of Psychoanalysis". Anyway, so according to Freud, humans have two kinds of motivation, "Eros" or the life motivation and "Thanatos" or the death motivation. Positive acts like taking care of oneself, eating, drinking, reproducing, etc fall under the first type of motivation and Acts like addiction, self-harm, fall under the second category.
I panicked! What I do is like a death wish! No no no! Have to find a solution, now!
First thing I decided to is stop calling myself a procrastinator. The word has too much of a know-it-all ring to it and makes me only want to find the "scientific" reason behind my stupidity instead of actually doing the work.. By the time I complete saying the word, I have already lost half of my motivation. And honestly, it is just the euphemistic version of lazy. So, I have decided to call myself LAZY, every time I get the urge to postpone my work.
I start with it TODAY. Right NOW.
